“I want to change the paradigm” and when you know it’s time to walk the dog

A few days ago, I had one of those wonderful, rapid-fire text exchanges with friend and Restorative Justice colleague, Caroline Becker. One of those flying thumbs conversations where, if we had been together in person, we would have been finishing each other’s sentences. Caroline is a teacher and when I come across intriguing materials related to the application of Restorative Justice in education, I send them her way. I was particularly struck last week in my PAX 571 Restorative Justice course on the assigned reading, Justice on Both Sides, by Maisha Winn. I sent Caroline some excerpts, and here was her reply:

“That’s my work, Julie. That’s where my heart is and where I feel this odd and vague professional and personal call. I want to change the paradigm through which we view student behavior, especially in the Catholic schools. When a student makes an academic mistake, we back up and reteach. But when a student makes a social or behavioral mistake, we punish. The dignity of the child invites us to rethink that punishment. 

But that leap, like the writer says, is large and daunting. It feels vulnerable and it feels like giving up control. And administrators don’t always know how to support their teachers. This is precisely where I fall, Julie. Our schools need this shift, I just haven’t the slightest idea how to affect that change outside of my own classroom.” 

I commented to Caroline that the more I learned about Restorative Justice, the more I explored it, the more I wanted to know, but at the same time, have found I need to take breaks from it. Here was her thoughtful reply:

“Yes. That’s why Amplify RJ has self care as the roots of their RJ tree. From a teacher and brain-research perspective, RJ asks teachers to problem solve in unique ways all day and not take behaviors personally, so if our nervous system isn’t calm and regulated, our brain will never be able to do that highly flexible critical and creative thinking all day. Kids’ brains mirror what we put out, so calm is the name of the game.  Make sure you give yourself permission to do that self care! On that note, Cora and I are going for a walk!”